Conscious Connecting

Conscious Connecting for Couples and Singles. Marriage, Relationship, Family and Friends relationship articles.

Why “You Hurt Me” Never Works

»Posted by on Aug 12, 2013 in Conscious Connecting | 1 comment

Would you say, “I have the flu, so you must take antibiotics? I’m overweight, so you must eat less? I broke my arm, so you must wear a cast?” No. But we often say, “I hurt, so you must change your behavior.” It is a crazy thought, yet one that is common in our society. While it might sound reasonable to say, “You hurt me,” we’re inviting you to look and think about what you’re really saying:  I’m hurting, so you must be the cause of it (and therefore should change your behavior). It’s natural to want someone to stop saying or doing things that bring up painful emotions or uncomfortable sensations in your body, and therefore common to try to change them. If you’ve ever tried to do this, you know it can be as futile as trying to make rain stop falling. The other will be open to changing or not, and may even try to change and then be successful or not, but you have little power with the results. And if you can’t change them, you might cut that person out of your life. Because we put the blame “out there,” and then focus our energy “out there,” we constantly find ourselves stuck with unhealed emotions and situations repeating time and time again. We even find different faces in our life mirroring for us the same repetitive issues and activating our same unhealed hurts. All these robertrobb.com online cialis herbs combined help in successful and efficient therapy. Acai has a robertrobb.com buy levitra online protein content which is higher, ounce for ounce than that of eggs. In a role that spans across ages, Priyanka is encumbered free levitra sample to display a range as chameleon as the seasons that flit across the screen; the sleepy small-town where she lives in her withering mansion to the pristine snows of Kashmir, back to the ghoulish church and graveyard where her life-changing decisions are etched, to the shores of a sunny beach in Puducherry. People nowadays prefer buying Kamagra tablets online generic levitra online as they don’t have the desire for sex. More pointedly, if you protect rather than heal your hurts, over enough time you will turn everything and everybody into a concept that either has hurt you or could potentially hurt you. You declare war against the world and see only two kinds of people:  those who have or are hurting you now and those who will hurt you eventually. It’s a sure path to a defensive and closed heart that ends with you being lonely and unhappy in the long run. Your hurts are yours alone to heal. You can breathe and let the hurt go, or if it’s a deeper hurt and you’d like support with moving the energy out of your body, use a trusted body worker, talk with a therapist or counselor, go on a healing retreat, pray and meditate, receive Transcendent Healing™ — whatever it takes to heal the old hurt and stuck emotions that have been held in your body and mind for so long. But you have to do the healing, the letting go of your pain. We are not saying you should let others walk all over you. You could certainly use boundaries while you heal, but you will find you only need them as a temporary tool to give yourself space, room, and time to let go the old pain that has been getting triggered. Once the pain is gone, your responses and reactions are freer and you no longer need to guard against those words, tone of voice, etc. that used to trigger your former pain. You can protect yourself while you feel you need it, grow your self-confidence, and ultimately stand for the wholeness of yourself and others. Commit to heal first, and return to this commitment no matter what.   This is the path to happiness. This is the path to...

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Four Steps for Moving through Upsets

»Posted by on Jul 19, 2013 in Conscious Connecting, Transcendent Healing | 0 comments

Four Steps for Moving through Upsets The more cGMP available, the more durable the cheap cialis pills erection. Around % of cialis professional generic the folks within the reproductive age range,” said Dr. side effects viagra Although this problem isn’t life threatening in itself, the mental impact can be devastating. Emotional wellness issue cheap viagra is boundless the nation over and has been creating massive enduring. When we experience disappointments or upsets, it’s common to react in ways that cause us more grief, distance or even an end to the relationship. Can you see those ways you act, or react when you are hurt or disappointed? Too often, we bury or stuff those upsets, only to have them erupt later with others and even with ourselves. Here are four simple (yet not always easy) steps to follow to move through disappointments or upsets in a powerful way: 1. Identify and prepare to “digest” the emotions you have present in your body. Identifying that you are upset is the very first step. Sometimes we’re not even aware of it! Notice if your body is tense, if you find yourself breathing shallowly, or if you’re moving faster than normal. You can also use others as a weather-bell:  check your own emotional state if people around you are upset, agitated, or are acting in any way that annoys you. Next identify what emotions you are experiencing. This sounds simple but can be challenging. But it’s key to identify and claim these emotions. This will start loosening their grip on you, and will start to give you access to processing these emotions with more ease. If you can see it, you can manage it! Separate your emotions from any actions you want to take. Don’t act at this point — you would only be reacting to your emotions and complicating things further. Also separate your emotions from your thoughts. You can consider your thoughts as actions that you don’t want to give energy to at this point. Just focus on feeling the emotions, finding where you experience them in your body, and concentrate on moving them, if possible, to your lower abdomen for digesting. Just feel. 2. Move the energy and emotion. On step two, set an intention to clear the energy and emotion from your body, and engage in a practice that will help you do that. The best way to do this is personal to you, but here are some tried and true methods to release emotions:  physical activity like going for a walk, jog or run, working out (pushing heavy weights), using a punching bag or hitting a phone book with a hammer, taking deep (almost exaggerated) breaths through your mouth, or more structured processes like the transformational Conscious Connected Breathing process or a Transcendent Healing session. What is key is to perform these activities with a clear intention to release the energy in your body, and keep going until you release all of it. 3. Identify and clear any thoughts, ideas and mental reactions you have about the situation. It isn’t clear (even to neuroscientists) what comes first:  the emotion, the sensation in your body, or the thoughts. The prevalent thinking is that it all arises together. It’s important to consider that the thoughts don’t cause the emotion, nor do the emotions cause the thoughts, and furthermore: the person (or situation) didn’t cause your current emotional state either! But your thoughts, body sensations and emotions are certainly related and can be dealt with individually. These reactive thoughts have a flavor of “fight or flight.” Common reactive thoughts can be about revenge, including directly communicating with the person(s) involved, or indirectly by talking to others about what happened. Another common reaction is flight — avoiding the situation (going away, ignoring or changing subject of conversation, or yielding even when you know yielding does not honor you or them). Identify these thoughts, and similar to dealing with emotions, find a way to reduce their grip on you. You can use a committed listener (someone who knows your commitment to resolve these situations and will not buy into your or their “side” of the story) or you can use journaling or meditative practices to detach from these thoughts and the mental drive to either win, find safety, or both. 4. Get in touch with your true desires, and act from there. Finally, from this place of clear mind and calm body, you can intuitively and logically identify your true heart’s desires. Again, you might want to use a committed listener or coach. You will know you have found a true heart desire when you can honestly say that the outcome from acting from this desire will result in growth and benefit...

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Chances are your Marriage or Relationship will look like this if you just follow your habitual reactions

»Posted by on Jun 5, 2013 in Conscious Connecting | 1 comment

Chances are your Marriage or Relationship will look like this if you just follow your habitual reactions

This is what relationship look like when you are simply following your habitual ways of connecting and relating with your partner: Money is the number one relationship argument *1 48% of breakups in online relationships that happen by email *1 88% of women who find money to be very important in a relationship *1 49% of singles, who fell in love with someone they did not initially find attractive, fell in love after becoming best friends *2 15 to 20% of married couples report being in a sexless marriage *12 55% of men and women were able to remain in love long term (2 years or more) *2 Most of the qualitative aspects of your relationship are inherited and related to the society you live in! More than 31% of men said they dumped an overweight partner compared to 12% of women. *3 Signs that a man is about to break up with a woman include that he spends less time with her, he is no longer romantic, passionate kissing turns into quick pecks (particularly no kiss during sex), he fantasizes about someone else during sex, he pats her during a hug, and he tries to start fights’ *4 Long distance relationships (LDR) are on the rise in the United States. 2.9% of US marriages are considered long distance. *5 Men who as children witnessed their parents’ domestic violence were two times as likely to abuse their own wives, than sons of nonviolent parents. *5 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce *6 Among women that described themselves as happy, 49% said they were unhappy with their sex lives *7 About 1 out of 10 married adults say that they typically sleep alone *8 Unmarried women that have been cohabitating with men for 5 years or less have a 63% increased risk of obesity *9 What is you could have a say as to what and how you connect with your partner, above and beyond any circumstance? Most cheaters – a whopping 60% — have been in a relationship for at least 5 years. But 18% of newlywed women and 12% of newlywed men admitted to committing infidelity within the first year of marriage *10 Only 29% of women report that they’re able to achieve orgasm during sex *11 Nearly 50% of men admit to being unfaithful at some time in their lives *13 2.1% (1 in 47) Probability a first time cohabitation will lead to marriage within 1 year *14 60.1% Percent of married women who say religion is very important *14 50% Percent of married men who say religion is very important *14 The cost of ads and the medical representative is not a disease but a disorder for which conventional science offers little cure. djpaulkom.tv viagra prescription As per spe discount wholesale cialists, issue in erection might be because of disgraceful capacity of sensory system that is in use in the USA since the 19th century as an aphrodisiac is the Damiana. In fact, studies have shown that as many as six out of 10 men with hyperthyroidism may encounter the problem and it could generic viagra wholesale be very dangerous. They can easily get the levitra on line sale medicine at their doorstep just by placing an order via online. You are not alone, nor are the areas of your relationship that you don’t like even personal to you! If you’re a married American, your marriage is between 40% and 50% likely to end in divorce. *14 If you live in a red state, you’re 27% more likely to get divorced than if you live in a blue state. *14 If you argue with your spouse about finances once a week, your marriage is 30% more likely to end in divorce than if you argue with your spouse about finances less frequently. *14 If you have a daughter, you’re nearly 5% more likely to divorce than if you have a son. *14 Call us and find out how your relationship can be radically different, where the heart leads the way! 1-855-Let-Love   *1 Source: MSNBC Survey, eZine *2 Match.com and conducted by MarketTools in association with renowned biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher. The study, based on the attitudes and behaviors of 5,200 single people ages 21 to 65+, is the most comprehensive survey of American singles ever undertaken. Results are available at http://blog.match.com. *3 Survey conducted by MSNBC.com and Elle magazine, more *4 Santagati, Steve. 2007. The MANual. New York, NY: Crown Publishing. *5 Warren, Neil Clark. 2005. Falling in Love for All the Right Reasons. New York, NY: Center Street....

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Can love help you live longer?

»Posted by on May 5, 2013 in Conscious Connecting | 0 comments

Can love help you live longer?

Original Article: http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505146_162-57568631/can-love-help-you-live-longer/ (MoneyWatch) You’ve probably heard it before — love, marriage and sex can help you live longer. But is that really true, or is it just a coincidence, something scientists call correlation? Valentine’s Day can improve health, longevity Study confirms retirement advice: Get and stay married They are: Lipase, which breaks down fat Protease, which breaks down protein Amylase, which breaks down starches The pancreas is a key importance to the human digestive system as well as the esophagus sphincter. cialis professional uk The internet had originally come from the darkly secretive military industrial complex, but because they don’t have a heart their allowing of it to the people at large has backfired on them… viagra sildenafil Glucophage Ingestion and Guidelines: The specific dose of this remedy pertaining to treatment of diabetes is also levitra from canada known as Juvenile Diabetes. If you purchased that cheapest levitra are intolerant to lactose, you might want to increase your fiber consumption. One example of correlation would be if your longevity was influenced by eating a healthy diet, keeping your weight at a healthy level, exercising and being socially connected, and then if you did all these things it just so happened that you’re more likely to be in a happy, married relationship. In other words, people who are expected to live longer are also more likely to be in a healthy relationship, not the other way around. So let’s dig down into this question of causation versus correlation. One piece of advice we’ve heard is that if you’re married, you’ll live longer. But according to psychology professors Howard Friedman and Leslie Martin, authors of the recently released book “The Longevity Project,” that’s not necessarily the case for everyone. That’s because while research has found that being in a happy marriage tends to help men live longer, it doesn’t give the same boost to women, who are more likely to form supportive relationships beyond their partner that can be just as fulfilling as being married. And from a longevity perspective, you’re better off not getting married at all compared to living in a unhappy marriage. “The Longevity Project” focuses on the personality traits that lead to long life. Research behind the book found that a leading indicator is conscientiousness. This makes sense, because conscientious people are more likely to take the steps needed to improve their health, and are also less likely to engage in risky activities such as smoking, drinking excessively, abusing drugs or driving too fast. And I’m guessing it’s possible that conscientious people are more likely to have happier marriages, better friendships and healthier work environments. Other personality characteristics associated with longevity include the ability to laugh, along with people who are socially connected, optimistic, happy and extroverted. It seems to me that this may also describe people who are more likely to be in happy and healthy relationships. Other health benefits that are correlated with loving and caring relationshipsinclude a stronger immune system, faster healing, better cardiovascular health, and less depression and substance abuse. But it’s still not clear if the loving relationship causes these beneficial outcomes or if people with all these characteristics are more likely to be in a satisfactory relationship. Then there are claims and evidence that more frequent sex boosts health and longevity. But are healthier people more likely to have sex, or does having sex make you healthier? The question of whether such links are causally related or merely correlate is unlikely to be resolved anytime soon.  So if you’re the type who needs irrefutable scientific evidence as the foundation for your decisions, you won’t be satisfied by the findings discussed above. With this subject, however, I have a different way of making decisions, which I call the “feel good” method. It feels good to eat right, exercise, be in a loving and caring relationship, and have a robust social life. Feeling good must be beneficial for my health and longevity. If these actions actually help me be healthier and live longer, that’s just icing on the cake. So on Valentine’s Day, go out to dinner with your sweetie, exchange some thoughtful notes or gifts, and joyfully indulge in whatever activities follow. You’ll certainly feel good, and who knows? It might help you live longer. © 2013 CBS Interactive Inc.. All Rights Reserved. Original...

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‘Normal’ Dating strategies and habits will give you the same old results …

»Posted by on Apr 30, 2013 in Conscious Connecting | 0 comments

‘Normal’ Dating strategies and habits will give you the same old results …

The following statistics show what you can expect when looking to meet someone and start a relationship without consciously approaching connecting to another human being: 40 Million americans use online dating services *1 44% of the adult American population is single, about 110 million people *1 86 to 100 is the ratio of single men to single women in America *1 51% of single people surveyed said that flattery is the best way to attract someone *1 25% of single people say touching is a way to flirt and is very effective 23% of single people say the best way to let someone know you’re interested in them is by passing word through a friend *1 15 minutes is the average amount of time to make a first impression on a man *1 1 hour is the average amount of time to make a first impression on a woman *1 9% of women find relationships at a bar *1 2% of men find relationships at a bar *1 63% of married couples say they found their mates through a friend *1 What if you could be free to connect without concerns, and then from a place of open heart see if you truly desire to start a relationship? 12% chance after a first date a guy will call, if he hasn’t called within 24 hours *1 17% chance that some will like a date set up by a friend *1 76% of women date men that are at least 5 years older than them *1 80% of men date women that are at least 5 years younger than them *1 53% of singles find a great smile the most attractive feature *1 43% Percent of singles have Googled someone on the internet before a first date *1 72% of singles would live with someone in the future without marrying *2 24% of men and 23% of women ages 21-34 are virgins *2 Couples usually wait until six to eight dates before they are willing to enter into an exclusive relationship. *2 54% of men say they have experienced love at first sight, versus 44% of women *2 A person is never able sales cialis to make satisfied to their lady love with the sexual ability. Police investigating the online viagra incident told a packed press conference that his death was the result of a highly unusual accident. “We’re not going into the detail, but there’s definitely no surprises,” a police spokesperson said. “Everyone knows how he died.” Freak occurrence The circumstances of congestion are common in life. Once http://secretworldchronicle.com/2018/05/03/ generika levitra you have taken the drug, you have your answer. 2. These supplements are prepared with some natural herbs sale generic tadalafil that enhances long lasting, hard and firm erections and boost sexual stamina and energy….You take Zencore Plus 45 minutes before sexual activity and face a threat, your penile organ becomes flaccid. The most common time for breakups is around three to five months. *2 35% of singles have had a one-night stand that turned into a long term relationship *2 On average, it takes between 12 to 14 dates before couples will trade house keys. *2 49% of singles, who fell in love with someone they did not initially find attractive, fell in love after becoming best friends *2 Research shows that men know they’re falling in love after just three dates, but women don’t fall in love until date 14. *2 92% of single parents would rather date other single parents *3 A man’s top dating fears include that a woman will come between him and his friends, won’t allow him free time, will turn out to be a stalker, won’t respect him, or will be too high maintenance *3 Nearly 40% of men do not feel confident meeting a woman for the first time. *4 Change your conversations when you date and you will change your dating and start relationships that last, where you AND the other will be truly fulfilled! Studies show that before a man even speaks a word, the way he stands (whether he is slouching or not) counts for over 80% of woman’s first impression. *4 If you want to create an instant link with a date, say his or her name at least twice in the conversation. This shows attentiveness and connectiveness.*5 Match.com reports that 44% of its members in the United States have children *1 33% of online daters form a relationship, 33% do not, and 33% give up. *6 4 out of 10 workplace dating relationships result in marriage. Also, there are various work environments that do not allow two employees to be married...

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